I first wrote in this blog in May, 2011. Now, two years later, this is my last entry.
“One day you are going to lose everything you have. Nothing will prepare you for that day. Not faith… not religion… nothing. When someone you love dies, you will know emptiness… you will know what it is to be completely and utterly alone.” — John Bergin, introduction to The Crow, Special Edition by James O’Barr.
I now understand that you never get over a loss like this. The pain fades, becomes less all-consuming, and it’s easier to remember the happy memories. But you never get over the loss; you have to accept it and make it part of you. I am ten times the person I was before I met Ailish and I would not trade a single moment I had with her.
This past weekend, I ran a 10K Run/Walk/Ride 4 Traffic Safety and then ran the Edmonton Police Foundation Half Marathon the next day (amusingly, they claim I’m in the 40 – 49 age category). It was a perfect way to end off the month. Ailish would have been proud. She also would have categorically refused to run two runs in a single weekend.
This blog has been a place for me to share stories from my life with Ailish. This was my place to talk about Ailish. For every story I told, a hundred people have a hundred stories of their own. Ailish was a central player in so many people’s lives. I’m not out of stories; there are still so many, but this is the last one I’ll tell here.